If life is a beach then my mom could always be found playing in the sand. Although Myotonic Dystrophy took her from this earth earlier than we had hoped, her enduring positivity and hope in the face of extreme personal hardship was something those of us who knew her will carry forever. And in her honor, and as she always sought to spread that love and joy, we hope that by continuing to remember her others can catch a glimpse of that kind of light for themselves.
When my mom was in hospice the chaplain asked her if she wanted to have any prayers said on her behalf. She laughed and replied that they had better pray TO her instead of for her because she would have special powers soon. It was with that sort of energy and aplomb that she conducted all of her life. Overcoming predictions that she would possibly never walk, talk or see she went on to graduate from Rosemont College in 1979. At a time when there were no accommodations for her visual impairment in lecture halls, she would remain after class every day taking notes off of the discarded overhead slides. She graduated with a degree in early childhood development and went
on to work at a school for the blind in Philadelphia, helping other visually impaired individuals maintain their independence & learn that they were capable of greater things than they had imagined. Later in the early 90s and 2000s, she ran a home daycare that allowed women to return to their careers before their children had reached pre-school age. After that, she began an entirely new career with the West Chester Area School District as a one on one aide for students with special needs so that they could have a school environment that was less difficult than the one she had faced. Theresa O’Connell was, in short, a heck of a woman.
She routinely amazed doctors and nurses with her endurance and good spirits, fascinated nurses and caregivers with stories
of her travels and despite any discomfort, she may have faced was always able to offer someone a smile and a bit of goodwill if she felt that they needed it. She delighted in spending time with her family; took immense pride in all of the success and love in the lives of her many nieces and nephews; and crowed with joy at any news of birthdays, weddings, new babies, good parties, and most especially news of a sale at Talbots. She was happiest when found on the beach, with a large print Danielle Steele novel & the promise of crab legs for dinner (as her daughter and crab leg lieutenant I had to become fast enough to crack both her order and mine before they got cold). People always think I got my sense of humor from my Dad because he is good at telling jokes but really it was because my mom could find the humor in anything. She was the kind of person who could make herself cry laughing because of a funny story she was re-telling about a night out from 30 years prior & by the end of it you weren’t sure what was funnier: the story or the laughing. Wetting your pants was a risk you had to be willing to take to make life worth it.
I’m not sure how it had all gotten started but in my mom’s family it became customary to join hands before a big family dinner and Shake The Love Around & declare that the company you found yourself in was so great that there were “none better and damn few as good”. And really with Terry, there weren’t. The day before she passed I asked her if she would do
anything in life over again what might it be, and she told me that even with everything she wouldn’t have changed a thing, just maybe that she wished she could have met my dad sooner to love him longer. I asked if there was anything she’d do over just for the hell of it and she told me that if she could do one last day at the beach, working all day as a hostess at The Golden Inn and then getting off working and taking a boat to The Point in Avalon to go tubing and have a few beers. So I guess the moral of the story is when the going gets tough, the tough get on their phone and call their loved ones and try to make it a party.
My mom will be my mom forever, but I got to hold her hand for 10,914 days. In her memory, I am working to shake more love around by raising $10,914 for the Myotonic Dystrophy Foundation. With these funds, they will be able to continue their work helping others focus on the positives.
To do this, I hope you'll join me in running, hiking, biking, or swimming 10,914 meters (about 6.78 miles) in honor of her birthday, October 20th. She would have turned 65 this year.
Thank you,
Colleen O'Connell
